Pine Cliffs Ocean Suites, Algarve

Overpriced resort masquerading as 5 star. I was so excited about this resort based on the photos. What the photos don’t show is the smell of sewage on the grounds, unfriendly staff, and so many flies and wasps buzzing around the breakfast buffet (which is almost inedible aside from the bread, by the way) that you can’t even sit down and enjoy a coffee. Our kids had 3-4 wasps buzzing around them as they tried to eat, which of course resulted in screaming and us having to leave. The Suites are outdated with ants crawling all over the place, black mold in the bathroom, toilet tissue holder broken, and it smelled like fish (We were advised to book it when asked for a location next to kids club). We switched to the Gardens which was better but I think it’s extremely confusing to try and book the “right” location. But at $700+ per night for the suites, they should be ashamed of the condition of those units. Everything is extremely overpriced for what you get. The food is average. A tiny bottle of water is 4£. The grounds felt unkept. The beach is beautiful, I will give it that. But you’re better off going to Dominican Republic if you want a relaxing beach resort. The staff at the front desk, the burger place, zest etc were all grumpy and acted annoyed you were even there. The staff at Mare were nice.

We stayed at the Ocean Suites on the property for four nights. Everything was great except the front desk and concierge at the Ocean Suites. They failed to correctly make a taxi request and failed to make any of the 3 dinner reservations we requested. Management was never available - actually no management is there 2 days a week!! Horrible customer service. We had to go to the main hotel to get any sort of customer service. For the large sum of money they charge per night to stay there, lack of customer service should not be an issue!!

First the positives - the grounds are beautiful, the beach is nice, the staff are generally pleasant and well meaning. Our room (a 3 bedroom penthouse suite) was ok, if dated and worn. Also, it is easy to hear furniture being dragged across the floor in a neighbouring apartment. Others have complained about this and it’s easy to solve (foam-pads on furniture legs), so not quite sure why the hotel has done nothing about it. But now for the worst bit - the food. It’s bad and it’s very expensive. If it wasn’t bad, I’d be ok with it, but a couple of examples. My daughter ordered a tuna bread dish in the health cafe (Zest)… she was given a burnt ciabatta with tuna from the can. A joke for 18 euros. We then had dinner in Portofino, the hotel Italian restaurant. I ordered a pizza, which was undercooked. My daughter ordered a truffle pasta, which was effectively a supermarket mushroom pasta with some cheap truffle from a jar. The latter was 45 euros! Finally, even though Corda cafe was ok, 39 euros for a fajita…. Really?!!!! Also the breakfast - I asked for them to add some fresh scrambled eggs to the buffet tray. The cook withdraws a large pre-prepared dish from below the counter, that had clearly been there a while… very off-putting.. no thanks. Believe me, there are much better dining options, and considerably cheaper, just outside the hotel. The hotel should also do something about the flies in the sun bathing area (near the lift to the beach). It became hugely irritating to sit in this area due to this. I ended up staying on the beach as a result. So there you have it - basically a nice hotel, let down by really bad and expensive food. I would not return.

We went to the piri piri steakhouse for dinner it was shocking we waited 15 minutes for our drinks to arrive then my steak was really fatty and not presented very well my Husbands steak was ok but definitely not worth 52euros!! Don’t go on a Thursday as they are getting rid of all produce as they are shut on a Friday and Saturday had better steak in villamora than here for half the price !!! Very overpriced for what they pretend to be ..,, This is no reflection on the hotel as it is clean tidy and a amazing hotel cannot fault.

We are concluding a week stay here; We have elite tier status with Marriott and were disappointed in this stay - The food all around was way below expectations, and way below the simple quality we cook at home – from steaks at Piri Piri to simple fajitas as Corda; I wish we didn’t do Half Board – and the resort needs a serious uplift in chef skills – import new chefs If needed, what was served was not acceptable, and simple recipe tweaks could have delivered so much more - Ants in room from day 1 – we had to ask for our place to be disinfected, but it seems like a common problem – if that’s the case – please spray between client changes and/or often - Screaming children everywhere – ruining the atmosphere at the pool and at dinners. It’s not the resort’s fault but we beg the resort to make simple tweaks, the resort could deliver a huge change for guests – eg - for the biggest dining areas – please separate where families with young children sit vs. adult only / families with teenagers. Jardim and Portofino were the worst. There are 8 pools – could you make several 15+ or introduce etiquette rules? - Would echo guest prior reviews on being nickel and dimed; The resort loves to talk about having water sports – but all of them cost extra money and sometimes significantly – 15 minutes on a jet ski was some insane amount; Taking one group gym lesson – 15-20 Euro; Half board doesn’t cover water/drinks; Lots of extras added on – left us with a further bad experience; You can do much better - If you want to sit on the beach every day – the beds were packed like sardines. Avoid. Widely, staff were lovely and helpful; albeit Portofino restaurant team were completely scattered; Grounds beautiful, rooms well cleaned excluding the ant issue; Easy to get around the resort. In the round -incredibly expensive and experience delivered not commensurate with cost