El Conquistador Resort

El Conquistador Resort Review – Real Talk We got to El Conquistador in Fajardo on a Monday evening, just as the sun was going down. There are two big Hertz signs right next to the little shuttle carts out front, so I parked our Hertz rental there after double-checking with a couple bellhops and even the Hertz desk manager. They all said we were good to go. Check-in was smooth, and the front desk folks were friendly enough. When we got to our room, I realized it was not what we booked. The view was just a sideways glance at the shoreline, not a full ocean view, and to make things worse, there were stairs. Not ideal for dragging luggage up and down. We told the bellhop right away, and he called the main office to help us switch. Props to him for sorting it out fast. We got moved to a real ocean-view room on the fourth floor with high ceilings and an elevator this time. That made a huge difference. Still, kinda weird that “mistake” happened in the first place. The bathroom was a letdown. The water only got lukewarm, and the sink drained super slow. Not a deal-breaker, but definitely not five-star quality. On our first day, we ate dinner at the resort, and honestly, it was also the last time we chose to eat there. We tried Ballyhoo Bar & Grill. My wife ordered a steak, and what came out looked and tasted more like meatloaf—and was way too rare. The flan dessert was so tiny it looked like a joke. Tres leches was better, but nothing justified the high price. If you want real value and good food, skip the resort restaurant. There are tons of local spots in Fajardo that are way better and cheaper. Ask a bellhop for suggestions or just explore. That’s half the fun. Now, about those funicular elevators everyone talks about. They’re cool in theory, but honestly, they’re unpredictable. Sometimes both cars would go up at once, sometimes both would go down. During the day, they actually have elevator operators posted there, but it really just feels like they’re there for show. Mostly, they just stand around and let people in and out, but you can tell they’re not actually running anything. At night, there are no operators and the elevators run on their own. The whole setup feels old and overdue for maintenance. If you look close, you’ll see rust everywhere on the structure. The main cable looks okay, but the rest of it? Not exactly confidence-inspiring. One odd thing happened: my wife said hi to one of the elevator operators, an older guy with gray-white hair. He didn’t say a word back—just acted strange and moved around kind of erratically, like he didn’t want to be there, or maybe something else was going on. Either way, it came off as rude, and it left us both wondering what was up with that interaction. And here’s another thing: the construction crews weren’t just making noise during the day—they were actually working on what looked like a major renovation project (restoration) right in the section close to our hotel rooms. They seemed to be trying to fix up or restore that part of the hotel to make it look better. It was hard to ignore the banging and activity. So the relaxing island resort vibe was pretty much gone during the day. Fajardo itself is packed with good food and chill bars, and you’re not stuck eating at the hotel unless you want to be. There are beachfront ceviche spots, cozy taco joints, and even some rum bars where you can catch live music at night. Just walk or drive a few minutes off the resort and you’ll find plenty of local gems to try. For my money, you’ll get better flavor and a way more local vibe this way than eating at the resort. Also, watch out for random upcharges or menus with “market price” but no actual numbers. Always check if the tip is included and don’t be afraid to ask questions before you order. While staying at the resort, I noticed at least three stray dogs regularly roaming the property. They seemed friendly enough, and most of the time they just shied away from people, which was totally fine by me. But there was one incident where two dogs barked loudly at each other—not a real fight, but loud enough to be noticed. One of them ended up scaring a young toddler who was right next to one of the rooms. I didn’t actually see anyone feeding the dogs, but I did see the staff put out water bowls for them, so I assume they get fed somehow. The dogs just lay around like the resort is their home, which honestly doesn’t bother me—except for the fact that they use the grass as their bathroom. You could see evidence of this in different patches of grass right next to the rooms. If you’re going to let dogs hang around the resort, they should at least be trained to use a designated area instead of just doing their business anywhere. Otherwise, it’s kind of off-putting for guests. Here’s where the game room got on my nerves. They have about four pool tables in the game area, but unfortunately, there were no posted rules for how long anyone could play. So what happens? People would just hog the tables for hours. Seriously, I’d leave to do other activities, come back later, and the same crew would still be camped out at the same table, sometimes even holding spots for their friends. If you’re not part of their group or don’t know them, you’re pretty much locked out. Your only shot at getting a table is waiting until after midnight or getting up early, which isn’t realistic if you’ve got excursions or want to actually enjoy your vacation. All they need is a decent rule, a timing system, or at least somebody managing the area so everyone can get a turn. When I finally got to play, it was on the backup table outside, right next to the pool area in the hot and humid air—even at night. That table was in disarray, missing a cue stick and the white ball, but I still managed to play a few games with my daughter and she enjoyed it. Still, it was annoying thinking about the whole pool table situation. To add to that, I actually asked someone who’d been on a table for hours if they were leaving soon so I could get a chance to play with my daughter, and of course, the person just said, "No, we’re going to be playing here for a while." Kind of ridiculous—if you give people unlimited access with no rules, some will take full advantage and others miss out. Now, let me talk about one of the most stressful and frustrating parts of the stay—the whole situation with parking and the rude bellhop. One night, after we got back from a really good meal at a local diner, all we wanted to do was go back to our room and relax. Instead, we ran into this bellhop (who switched from friendly to loud real quick) who told us we couldn’t keep parking in the Hertz spot out front, even though everyone told us it was fine before. He insisted that the spot was only for Hertz drop-offs, which made zero sense—because most people renting from Hertz are using the car to get to and from the hotel or the airport, not just dropping off. The logic was just annoying. When we first pulled up, he looked really friendly—probably thought we had just arrived and would need him to check us in and handle our luggage, maybe expecting a tip. But once he realized we were already checked in and didn’t need help with luggage, his whole vibe changed. He got loud and obnoxious, telling us we couldn’t park there, even though we’d already asked multiple people from the resort and been told it was fine. Honestly, it seemed like he was only interested in helping us if there was a tip in it for him. I almost wanted to question him or get a manager involved, but my wife told me not to cause a scene. If I had been there alone, I probably would have pushed back, because the whole situation was ridiculous and the rules weren’t clear. Once we parked in the remote lot, here’s another headache: unless you tell someone at the front desk or bellhop in advance that you’re about to park there, don’t expect the shuttle cart to magically show up. There’s no button, phone, or system to notify staff you’re waiting. So if you’re disabled, elderly, or just not able to walk the distance, you’re left hoping a shuttle rolls by eventually, or you’re hoofing it with your bags. They really need a way for guests to call for a pickup, especially for anyone who can’t walk far. We took the boat over to Palomino Island, which is beautiful, but only one boat was running that day. Getting there was easy, but coming back took forever. We waited through three boatloads of people before we finally got on. Staff did hand out water and beer to help with the wait, but it still felt pretty disorganized for a big-name resort. Most of the staff were nice, but there were some misses. That elevator operator encounter really stood out as one of the weird ones. We also did the van tour of El Yunque National Forest. The tour guide was all right—he tried his best to keep us entertained with a few jokes, though honestly, most of them just didn’t land. English probably wasn’t his first language, and that’s totally fine, but the effort to be funny and entertaining just didn’t really come through. Still, he did what he could, and I respect the hustle. The last stop was a beautiful river spot, where we finally got to relax and watch people and locals jump in and out of the water. It was the kind of place you could easily stay for hours just soaking up the atmosphere. Unfortunately, our guide seemed to be in a rush, so we didn’t get to enjoy it nearly as long as we wanted. There is honestly so much to experience in the rainforest. You could spend days there exploring. It’s paradise on earth and one of those rare places I genuinely want to come back to just so I can see it all at my own pace. The tour overall was just adequate—nothing fancy, and honestly, nothing the guide said was anything I couldn’t have just Googled on my phone if I wanted to learn more about local plants, bugs, or whatever. The tour felt overpriced for what it was, and especially inconvenient at the end when we felt rushed out of a beautiful spot. If you’re thinking about doing a tour, you’re probably better off just renting a car and exploring on your own so you’re not on anyone else’s schedule. Here’s something to remember: Puerto Rico is one of those places you could easily spend a month in and still feel like you’ve only scratched the surface. A week is just the tip of the iceberg—I honestly wish I would have stayed longer, of course at a different resort. There’s just so much to experience, and the more time you spend here, the better you get to know what makes the island special. A few things to keep in mind: Try local food spots for better meals and prices. Be patient with the elevators and boats; they run on their own schedule. Ask every time you park, and get the rules in writing if you can. The area looks rough at first, but the locals are nice. Just stay aware, like anywhere. Budget extra time for everything. With construction, stray dogs, and weird logistics, don’t expect a smooth five-star experience. Would I go back? Maybe if they fix the place up and finish the renovations. Until then, I’d stick with Fajardo’s local gems and do more exploring on my own. Hope this helps someone else plan a better trip.

We had the waiter Gilberto and he was absolutely amazing!!! So attentive and friendly. Food was unbelievably good and was given recommendations on activities to do around the island.

My family and I stayed for 5 nights at this hotel, and we loved it. Our room was 1133 overlooking Coqui Water Park. We had room service once for dinner and once for breakfast. They were both good, a bit pricey, but that's every hotel. The room was spacious, and the bathroom is beautiful. We also ate at the grill in the Coqui Restaurant and the mexican restaurant. The mexican restaurant was delicious with a hint of PRican fusion. My kids had paletas and my husband couple of cortaditos from the coffee shop. We also drove around Luquillo to get some dinner and breakfast. If you are not planning on leaving from the hotel I recommend buying any junk food, cereal or munchies to save some money, before arriving to the hotel especially if you have little ones. There is no microwave in the room, but they do have a small kitchenette with a small refrigerator. The ferry to Palomino was great. Palomino Island is so nice, and they have 8 bands for the scavenger hunt. My kids loved the scavenger hunt. Every single staff in this hotel from the cleaning people till the front desk were so professional and nice! Good Job!! I really can't wait to go back. My family and I will return! The only thing I didn't like was the stary dogs fighting in front of my balcony, but that's really a Puerto Rico issue.

Overall, the experience was just ok. The exterior entrance of the hotel is beautiful. Landscaping was gorgeous. Our check in process was easy enough. What they don't tell you is that they require a $1000 security deposit for each room in your reservation. In our case, we had 3 rooms. It would have been nice to have known this information prior to check in. I don't recall reading this information anywhere but I could have missed it. I chose to book the least expensive room due to the fact that we truly do not spend a lot of time there. We like to be active and not lounge in the room. The rooms were spacious. The shower had not been cleaned properly and there was hair on the shower floor and on the tiles on the shower wall. Not just a few strands either. The water was barely warm enough to shower in. This was experienced in all 3 rooms. The bed wasn't luxurious but it did the job. There was no trash can in the room and no remote for the TV (my husband likes to watch tv before sleeping). We requested these items and only one tiny trash can was delivered and no remote. The housekeeping was an absolute JOKE. They didn't wipe off bathroom countertops, scrub shower daily...we had the iron and ironing board out one evening and they didn't put that up either. Sand was still on the bathroom floor after they "cleaned". We came in one evening around 5pm and housekeeping had not been by yet. I have never experienced a resort where almost every worker was rude until this one. I would speak to either be ignored or have no response in return. Most but not all of the employees acted disgruntled and refused to show common courtesy. I will say every worker we came across at Palomino Island were excellent. The wait staff on the island were fantastic as was the food. The cost was another factor. The food is incredibly expensive for what it is. We only had one meal at the resort the entire 5 days that we were very happy with. Drinks average $12 each. Water is $3 a bottle. Soda is $4 for a small cup. We traveled with 8 people and one of our bills for lunch was $359. So be prepared to have very few options for affordable food. The water park was a big hit for all of us. We thoroughly enjoyed both the water park and the island. The resort is spacious and never felt overly crowded due to there being numerous pools and the island to enjoy. In the main building they have pool tables and a shuffleboard table. The pool sticks were in bad shape, most broken. If you wanted chalk for the stick, it was literally rubbed into the carpet on the ground. There was no salt on the shuffleboard and the board truly needed to be replaced or repaired. When you pay the prices you do at this resort, it would be nice to have things that were in good shape. As an experienced traveler, I would not return to the resort. The resort could use some updating and repairs to the grounds. The marina was FILTHY. Old boats, disgusting water, trash in the water...it wasn't the most pleasant view from the balcony...again I chose this area due to cost. Taking an uber into the city of Fajardo was an average of $30 each way. Be cautious if you go into the main strip of town and eat at La Parrilla....our tab was $1033 for 8 of us. Overall, the resort is just ok. Do not expect the pristine pictures they have online.

Excellent service and food! Osbel did an amazing job. Everything as expected, Relax place for couples or families……….