Round Hill Hotel and Villas

Want a terrible experince in Jamaica? Go to Round Hill ! See the pictures for what 950 bucks a night gets you at this sewer of a hotel. We booked through Amex Fine Hotels as we have booked many amazing hotels over 15 years. It was just two of us so we booked a room, (not a villa) in the Pineapple House. We booked the highest category with an oceanfront room. Upon checking in we asked the bellman where the drawers were for our clothes. He showed us dirty wicker baskets and said this is where we were to put 6 days of clothes. Because there is a dress code at dinner we had several outfits per day packed and there was no way I was living out of a suitcase for almost a week on a vacation. Yes you read that right. THERE ARE NO DRAWERS! The room was filthy. Mold in the sink and tub (and on a chair) and a line of ants marching across the bathtub. It was stifling hot even though the air conditioning was on and the floor had bits and pieces of debris along with hair. The towel bar was pulling out of the wall. We asked the reception for another room with drawers at which point they told me the only rooms that have drawers are the three bedroom villas and that would be another 4,000 on top of the 5K. For 6 days for two people. By the way this is NOT all inclusive. When I asked about the upgrade with Fine Hotels program (a perk), they said, no that we had the highest category before a villa. When I said we would have to leave they said they would keep my entire 6 day stay. I explained that wasn’t really fair since the photos on the website do not portray the room accurately and there isn’t a place for our clothing. They said they would speak to the manager who conveniently wasn’t there at that time. So we had to wait. Several hours. And when it started getting towards dinner time (with us sitting in the sitting hot open air lobby) I knew we would have to stay the night because we were running out of time to get a hotel and transportation etc. When I mentioned to them that we needed to make a decision they said, “well you might as well stay since we will be charging you for tonight.” We went back to the room and started to make calls. I was able to secure a reservation at Half Moon-which was fabulous. The room was so hot and the island crickets were deafening. As it turns out there was NO GLASS ON SEVERAL OF THE DOOR PANELS. Yes, that’s right. Just wooden louvers on the door to a first floor room where a mom and daughter were supposed to sleep. Anyone could have walked down the beach and kicked in the louvers. Not to mention it was like stifling hot and loud from the crickets. Literally so ridiculous that when I tell this story to my traveling friends they can’t believe it. The door to the room was super flimsy with a silly lock and I piled our luggage against it as well as moved a chair against the back door with no glass. As you can see the oceanfront view was a joke and the patio furniture was from the another century. Who wants to have a cup of coffee in the morning sitting on a splinter staring at tree branches? Not me! That cup of coffee to clear your head after not sleeping in an unsafe, dirty, hot room? Nope. The bag of coffee had turned bad and was bursting at the seams. This is your 5 star situation at Round Hill Jamaica. Don’t do it! The bright spot is we returned to Half Moon and had a fantastic time in a suite overlooking the ocean. Why didn’t we book Half Moon since we had been there previously? There was a big concert festival that was ending and Half Moon was booked solid. Toni Braxton and some of the other headliners were staying at Half Moon (not Round Hill) but they were checking out the day we escaped from Round Hill. When we checked in the gal at the desk said we were the fourth party that had left Round Hill! I will mention that some of my friends have gotten a villa at Round Hill several years ago and loved it. Between their rec, Amex fine hotels and the pics online (which are totally misleading) we thought it might be fun to try a new place. We didn’t get to see the villas but honestly the attitude of the manager and the front desk staff was such that I wouldn’t try a villa if it was offered free. There are SO MANY GREAT PLACES to go on vacation and we have been very fortunate to have fantastic memories around the world. Round Hill is the very worst and I don’t say that lightly. In the end American Express went to war for me so I only had to pay one night. But they charged me $950 for a night in a dirty dangerous room that I couldn’t close my eyes in.

I'm just going to paste a version of a recent email I sent to the hotel: I wanted to tell you how delighted I was to have stayed at Round Hill this past week, for the very first time. The property is beautiful. Round Hill is a lush property with so much vegetation and natural beauty. From my initial telephone call for booking, to the moment I departed Round Hill, I experienced a level of service from all of your staff that pales in comparison to other hotels. Of special note were the following: Front Desk Staff made an immediate impression upon my arrival. They were organized, quick, and made check-in very easy. Mr. Owen ensured my bags were picked up with care. He also informed me about the villa tours and the right people to speak with. Mr. Kingsley and Mr. Junior gave amazing tours of the villas and the property (I went twice). Their professionalism and knowledge of Round Hill history and villa specifics is impressive. Ms. Hillary was my housekeeper and she did a great job. I loved coming back to my room because it looked and felt perfect every time. She also helped me to quickly put together my laundry order, which was done the same day. Mr. Parchment in Dining Services took excellent care of me as a solo guest and made sure I felt welcomed and comfortable at every turn. When my brother briefly visited for 2 nights, Mr. Parchment ensured he had a meal ready for late arrival. When I specially requested cornmeal porridge for breakfast (I am Jamaican) he ensured it was provided. All the dining staff was very kind and professional. Mr. Kenneth was my server on multiple evenings, and he made sure that every meal was to my liking. As a fellow Jamaican, he made me feel very welcome and at home. He has a great sense of humor too and so much energy! Kemar stood out as a guest favorite. I personally witnessed him give a detailed course to another couple at the bar on RUM! Even while overhearing him, I learned so much. Kemar was so great to talk to and is the reason I explored so much of the hotel that I didn’t even know about. Additionally, Ralph Lauren's design of the rooms/villas is very beautiful and I hope it doesn't change. The all white and dark wood theme with the shutters kept my room light and bright, and very Caribbean. I loved the bright white bathroom with the silver touches. I encourage guests to learn as much about the hotel as you can and experience everything! I did the glass bottom boat tour (bring meds if you have sea sickness, even though the water was considered calm, it was too choppy for me). And I loved learning about the coral and fish. The villa tour was incredible and we didn't even get to see most of them since they were occupied. The ones we did see were lovely. I also went (in a golf cart) onto the jogging trail and saw the herb garden where on Thursdays they pull from there for Farm to table meals. I still didn't even get to the spa and other excursions and parts of the property that I wanted to. I spent a lot of time on the beach and also witnessed a beautiful wedding. The only thing I would suggest is somehow filling any cracks in the ceilings. From time to time the croaking lizards can get in and I am extremely afraid of them :) Round Hill is 100% luxury and worth every penny. I can't wait to return!

Food is awful, this place needs a new chef, I have visited for years and am shocked they still have that chef. Why? What's going on there? Every meal was too small, over salted, cocktail party food was stale, and dont order anything with truffles you won't taste it. Staff hiding and not working at houses often come in for full day shifts work only 4 hours. Another hotel claiming they pull substantial produce from their on property garden. The garden was very small and I don't feel should be a feature of their selling point for restaurant menus.

The most magical and special resort! It’s one of those pinch me moments where it didn’t feel real. The staff and quality of the food was outstanding. Everyone was so pleasant and genuinely kind. I can’t wait to go back!

What an amazing stay again at this beautiful resort. The villa with private pool had breathtaking views of The Caribbean Sea and the lush gardens. Thank you for the fantastic staff making our stay so wonderful :-) Wade, Khaleel, Junior walker, Tash, Owen, Birch, Dahlia, Joy, Morgan, Oshan, Brandon, Fitzroy, Neil, Ashanee, Ashe and more! Thank you Josef for your hospitality! We look forward to next year anniversary celebration :-).